Most people, whether Christians or not, are always looking for guidance when making major decisions. They are seeking for something that will give them insight as to the correct path to follow. It may be on whether to take or leave a job, what career to follow, where to go to college, who to marry, how to invest their money, or a myriad of other issues. Since becoming Christians in 1982, Cheryl and I have always searched for the peace of God, and unity with each other, when making any major decision. These two things have always served us well. The scriptures tell us that a husband and wife are to be a one flesh relationship and that “they will be led forth with peace” (Isaiah 55:12). If you, or your spouse, do not have peace about a particular direction to take you need to pay close attention to that red flag and re-evaluate.
Over the last few years we have witnessed an alarming increase of bad decisions being made in what we thought were good solid marriages. We have been amazed and astounded by some of these actions that have injured or destroyed marriages, hurt children, and sometimes wrecked family businesses. As we have prayed about this, we believe God has given us some insight from a most unusual source.
The commentator on “60 Minutes” was recently interviewing noted author Michael Lewis, a former funds manager, whose most recent best selling book is entitled “The Big Short”. Lewis describes in this book his analysis of the reasons for the economic debacle over the last few years and specifically the sub-prime mortgage crisis and how the Wall Street bond market, banks, and money managers had contributed to this catastrophe. Without getting into all the complexities of the stock and bond market, the most important thing I heard from Lewis was that the short term financial benefits and incentives were so great that the architects of these failed financial instruments had been blinded to the devastating long-term consequences.
Lewis has hit on something here that is also the very reason we see marriages in trouble and people making unwise personal and business decisions. People are being deceived by super short-term incentives . These incentives could be economic or they could be emotional. Men and women are selling their souls for a quick fix versus being committed to long-term solid relationships. They cannot see, or refuse to take into consideration, the devastating long-term consequences related to their children, family, friends, businesses, etc. This fast-food, get it now, lustful,greedy, look back, quick-fix mentality only leads to destruction.It not only hurts the decision maker but it hurts everyone around them. The grass is not greener on the other side.It is artificial turf. If it appears too good to be true, it probably is. It is a deception and usually driven by our baser instincts such as financial need/greed or sexual/emotional attraction. The biblical accounts of David with Bathsheba and Judas being offered thirty pieces of silver are stark examples of these principles of lust and financial greed and both men paid dearly for their actions.
So how do we recognize and be led by God through this economic and emotional minefield. First of all, if you are a Christian, God has given you the Holy Spirit as a guide and helper and if you have a spouse you have a second helper. You need to pay attention to both! Many times (not always) the wife is more sensitive to the things of the Spirit than the husband. What we have witnessed in the past is that a wife may experience feelings of grief and sorrow about a business decision just like she does when she has lost a close friend or family member to death. The husband will usually not experience these type feelings. He is just trying to make a calculated business decision that makes logical sense to him, especially in the short term. Husbands, beware!! Do not discount the feelings of your wife. The biggest mistake I ever made in leading my family was when I refused to listen to my wife and charged off on my own because I was the leader of the household and I continuously reminded my wife of that fact.
Proverbs 10:22 says, “The blessing of the Lord, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow (grief, worry, pain) with it”. I Timothy 6:10 says, “For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, which some reaching after have been led astray from the faith and have pierced themselves with many sorrows(griefs).
We encourage everyone that reads this eblast to be led forth by the Spirit of God and by the peace of God. If you are married, make sure that you and your spouse agree on all major decisions. It should also be understood that grief and sorrows could be strong warning signs for your household that you may be going in the wrong direction.
I believe that God’s desire and perfect plan is for each one of us to be finishers of what we have started as long as it is up to us. Finishers of our marriages and finishers of the businesses and loyal friendships we have started. We serve a God that finished his works before the foundation of the world (Hebrews 4:3); we serve a savior that gave his life for each of us and the last words out of his mouth was “it is finished” (John 19:20); and we have a prime example in Paul the Apostle that said, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith” (II Timothy 4:7). I want to be counted in that number and I hope you do to. Let us all be known as a people that are committed to our commitments.
Rev. Ed & Cheryl Henderson
New Life Network, Inc.
www.newlifenetwork-org-staging.smwnm894-liquidwebsites.com
